#SlaneGirl

I have a couple of thoughts on the recent incident to dominate cyber space. For those of you that haven’t heard about what happened, A girl from Slane was recently caught on camera at the Eminem concert 3 times with 2 different guys in rather compromising positions. I’m not going to post the picture because if you really need to see it, you can find it easy enough and that’s not the purpose of this post. I’m not spreading the rumours because they’re already out there, I am simply voicing an opinion.

1) To those of you tweeting “Give #SlaneGirl a break ect….” are you dumb? If you are trying to let the story die down don’t add to the trending! Every tweet counts. By tweeting your hate of it trending, you are only helping it to trend. I know, lets just take a minute and let the irony wash over you. I’m sure you’re all upstanding people with the best of intentions. But by being these great citizens you’re only allowing the story to live on.

2) Don’t start spouting off about how she is only 16 so its our fault. If she is old enough to go out and do stupid stuff then she is old enough to get caught and deal with the consequences. I appreciate that her consequences are a lot more severe than others who have done stupid things but that’s life. Life’s unfair.

3) Her being drunk is not an excuse. I’m sorry, but I am very much of the opinion that you are just as responsible for your drunk actions as you are for your sober ones. If not more so, she made the decision to drink (even though as her supporters keep saying she “IS ONLY 16”) so she is responsible for her poor choices when she does so.

4) Shut up with your “this is what’s wrong with today’s generation” bullying existed way before the internet and yes its on a wider scale now and if your on the receiving end of it that’s harsh. But you’ve gotta take the good and the bad. Now if someone can sing and records a video in their bedroom its heard by a million people. We have thousands of people who have found fame over the internet. Internet fame has given us Jessie J, Alex Day, Jenna Marbles, that weird girl who ate a tampon in the name of JB. Yeah it sucks if you’re the person trending for a negative action but at the same time look at all the amazing opportunities the internet has given “our generation”.

5) There is a lot of animosity behind the fact that #slaneboy isn’t trending. I admit that its unfair and sexist and all that melarchy. But why are you surprised? There have always been different rules and regulations for guys and that’s just the way it is. The same way we still expect guys to pay on dates and we get doors opened for us in corridors. No it’s not fair but that’s the way it goes. Also I think part of it’s the fact that it was two guys, that’s not great.

6) Little Smile to all of you using Eminem lyrics in your tweets about her. I appreciate the creativity involved. It’s nice that even in perverted situations of young girls making mistakes that get caught on camera and end up going viral online, we can have fun with puns.

7) You aren’t perfect. I agree with freedom of speech and while I personally don’t see it as right you can say what you want about her on twitter. But just think back at your life, I am willing to bet there are moments you aren’t proud of (maybe not as bad, but still not great) that maybe wouldn’t look great if caught on camera. This will probably all die down on the web by next week, but this girl won’t forget it.

So my final thoughts on the issue. What she did was stupid and gross, she is responsible for her actions and has probably learnt her lesson ten times over. But youse on the internet are also responsible for your actions. And if you’re trying to help her, the best thing to do is shut up about it as soon as it leaves the trending topics  it’s forgotten, so don’t prolong things.

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Indecent Indirets

Okay so I want to clear a few things up about my previous post ‘I like you I like you not’. I have had 3 guys inbox me since and ask if it is about them. It’s not. Sorry. But no. For the record none of these guys had any kind of interest in me but they were all to happy that they could add a name to their list of admirers. But to these guys I say “don’t worry, none of you are the object of my affection so you can save the ‘I like you, I just don’t like like you’ speech it is not needed. ”

I never post my blog on facebook because I feel to self concious of people I don’t know that will reading it. However, Twitter is a place where I feel that if you follow me you choose to hear my thoughts so my blog is just an extension of this and so Twitter is just a place where I can shamelessly plug for viewers. However, the post question is clearly aimed at a specific person and I wouldn’t want to make them uncomfortable by having them stumble upon it in my tweets so rest assured the person referred to in my posts does not have Twitter, or at least not to my knowledge.

It is almost comical the people that have asked if this post has been about them, even though nothing in it is reflective of our reationship. Maybe it is something about guys that they are willing to see themselves in a flattering light. Where as a post could name me personally but if it is the slightest bit complimentary it is either a cruel joke or about a different Catty. I am jealous of people’s (of the majority males) ability to see the good in themselves.

Although it was annoying trying to convince guys for the past week that the post was not about them, as of course they all think I am just lying to them to save myself embarressment, I suppose I brought it on myself. I started this blog to be honest and although my post was revealing it was a shamful indirect. If I am going to give away my personal feeling I need to be in or out. Full disclosure or generalised comments, no specific examples. The politics of blogging is just to great. In all honesty I didn’t think anyone would ever read it, regardless of how often I hounded them on Twitter. So I never thought I would have to worry about being discrete. But it is unfair to the people I am talking about to name and shame them and force my emotion upon them.

So rest assured if you are reading this you’re not my secret love *relief sweeps over you*

Also sorry to anyone who read this and could literally not care less, but I felt I owed an explanation.

Lesson Learnt: No More Indirects.

Bus Behaviour

We have all done it; spoken that little but louder on the bus when some one hot is sat near us. Whether in a group or on the phone, our conversation will become that little bit more opinionated and just a tad pretentious. So much about our natural instincts tells us to shrink in to the background, walk with our heads down and avoid eye content. But there is something about public transport that brings out the attention seeker in us all. My behaviour on buses puzzles me, in some ways I feel the most confident I ever do, but then I also think I am at my most concious of people judgeing me. I won’t deny that in the past on my way home from school I have carried my most intelligent book in my arms not in my bag, I have made sure I am listening to good music in case you can hear it through my ear phones and I have looked through photos on my phone to make ot appear like I have people to text. I think I feel so obliged to keep up appearanceson the bus because I know how much I judge people on the bus. Normally it is harmless, I get bored so I sit and make up soap opera like back stories for those sat around me, but I will admit that occasionally my analysis is less than complimentary. Is it my own actions that have made me so self concious? Am I the creator of my own insecurities? Am I the reason I put on this pretentious persona? Why do I make things so difficult for myself?

What is in a name?

I have never met…

A Laura I didn’t like,

A James who couldn’t make me laugh,

A Sophie who wasn’t Beautiful,

A Peter that couldn’t hold a conversation,

A Georgia without strong self-confidence, 

A Tom who wasn’t sweet and kind hearted. 

Image

Is our fate decided the second our birth certificates are signed? Is in not nature vs. nurture but in fact nature vs. naming? Am I look for truth where in fact coincidence lies (probably, but that would be a very dull and short post so we will ignore that one for now). 

Sure there are exceptions to these rules, some where there is a shy girl called Georgia sat next to a serial killer called Tom who are thinking to themselves what a twat I am. But for the most part I think a name can say a lot about a person, which is foolish really because for most of us we have no say at all as to what we will be called in life. 

Judgements based on appearance and intelligence are one thing, but is it fair to base opinions of a person on something they had nothing to do with. Think about getting married . You meet the guy/girl/animal (I’m not judging …. well…. ) of your dreams, they are perfect. But their name is Barnical Whimply (I don’t even know, it was the first thing that popped in to my head). Are you going to end up together, will you grow old and have little Whimplys together? Or from the moment they introduced themselves did you not think ‘How the hell do I get away from this nutter?!?’ 

I think naming is one of the biggest responsibilities a parent has. Choosing the right name for a person you don’t really even know yet. There are such things as power names, or names of status. So is it right to think that by naming your child ‘correctly’ you could potentially be setting them up for life.

I read freakanomics over the summer and it pointed out that although names do go in and out of fashion, there is a also a name cycle which can be used to predict which will be power names of the future. Names such as Victoria and Edward were very common among the upper classes and so the most successful people of that generation were named accordingly, this was followed by families of the lower classes naming their children in this fashion to try are give them the power position, thus Victoria became a lower class name and new upper class names were introduced on to the social spectrum. Yet still the cycle continues. 

By  this logic, one could argue that it is not the name that determines the characteristics but coincidental that people of the same class and upbringing tend to name their children similar things, hence many smart Emmas and Sporty Joshuas. 

I wonder what people think when I introduce myself, what snap judgments are made by seeing only my name?

 

Caitriona Clare O’Connor

 

Who knows? 

Catty x

The Act of Judging

To Judge

Definition; verb

To form an opinion or a conclusion. The act of estimating ones worth or quality. 

It is in our basic instinct to judge, to look at a person and form an opinion of their character and social standings. In a way it takes us back to the very core of our being, to the days when ones outside appearance was a direct reflection to their inner beauty (or lack of as the case may be).

Personally, I feel we do it as a means of protection in life, a way to make ourselves feel secure among the unknown. Take a second to reflect on your day, maybe you went to school or mooched around town,you may have seen a
friend or slaved for hours at the office. Think of  the people you saw. Reflect upon your own inner monologue, now imagine one of these for every person whose path you crossed today. It is a scary thought.

It is a turn of phrase to say that a person’s world revolves around them, but in truth it is a statement of fact. We form judgements of people because the act of hearing everybody’s internal monologue is just to great a task. Judging people is just a coping mechanism, to help us deal with the pure varsity of the world.

Judging in itself is not a negative act. I will be the first and certainly not the last to say that I judge people and in turn expect people to form judgements of me. People will judge on my hair, clothes, vocabulary, conversations on buses, my facebook page and to try to avoid this is just stupid, because I myself do the same, openly.

However, it is when we let these judgements prevent us from forming fact based opinions of people and experiences that we had committed an injustice onto ourselves. In order to fully experience life a man must embrace it fully and head on. Maybe it is fear that holds us back or the humility of having to admit to misjudgeing someone, but in doing so we all stop ourselves from stepping out of the comfort zone of our heads and seeing what life has to offer.

I will not judge you for judging, but I will think less of you for acting purely upon those judgements.

I think that is the reason I have started this blog. To write not only of my observations and judgements made (a way of logging my inner monologue) but also admitting where my judgements were wrong. Here I will record my thoughts, comments and experiences in what I hope will me a semi comedic and insightful manner, although this I have little faith in.

So if you read this thank you. I will not ask you not to judge me, but will ask that you are kind in your judgements.

Catty